Lincoln Love Log (USA-Il): “Illnoise 2-Piece BBQ” Lp Cd 2007 Black Hole

Lincoln Love LogThis record is the perfect example of how sometimes expectations might be terribly, disastrously failed. A two-piece band from the Heart of Illinois, which was supposed to inherit the greatness of Impetigo, Lincoln Love Log had all the good chances to be great. Fernando of Black Hole has great taste for music and he’s a real veteran of the scene, not to mention a great artist when it comes to layout works. The artwork too is super slick and made by no other that Stevo himself. I was expecting pure hell. Everything was screaming for killer splattery grind with a nasty sense of humour.

Let me say things straight… WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT??? This might be the lamest, most boring, most useless band I have heard since a long time. Hidden behind a curtain of lo-fi noize, is just pure nothingness. Random weak riffing, cheap vocals like the worst Necrophagia  ever recorded, on a clumsy union of gay stoner riffs and boring mid tempos. Even with the best of intentions, I cannot understand why someone would actually listen to this crap for more that 3 seconds. I would spend my money better on Anal Cunt – at least they’re fast and vulgar, this band is just plain nothingness. Could trade it for Lullaby demos and i would be the one making profit. Fuck this crap, complete nonsense in a bad way – c’mon I love noise and incomprehensible music, but we’re not talking about extreme noise this time, just trendy mediocre shit for teenagers into drugs and that kind of stuff for losers. Which is worse than filling 30 minutes with just barfing. Fuck. Boycott this garbage.

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